Bristol Palin and Harper's Bazaar: How to make an absolute fool of yourself without even noticing it

Read the article on the website of Harper's Bazaar HERE.

Original screenshots from the print version can be found HERE.

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Bristol Palin has a problem. She now has a millionaire mom, but she apparently has nobody who dares to tell her when it's time to "pause" - and I am not talking about sex.

So, Bristol decided to pose for another photo spread in a magazine, after her famous cover-stories for People magazine and In Touch Weekly. This time she chose Harper's Bazaar. She is an uptown girl now!

The result is memorable. Not just because it's "another ultimate puff piece".

The "medical assistant in a dermatologist's office" and "wanna-be-hockey-mom" Bristol Palin proudly presents a previously unknown message: Luxury is cool.

In addition, as is to be expected, she has new details about her colourful life to share.

Bristol greets us with a confident smile, wearing an elegant gown, silver teapot in hand and baby Tripp next to her in a chair, surrounded by cakes and lots of other sweet things. It's an adorable picture, isn't it:

But is this really a world which young teen moms can identify with today? Somehow I doubt that they would recognize this as a reality.

Let's take a closer look at Bristol's glamorous and very expensive outfit and jewellery:

Lanvin Gown $4,385

Karma El Khahil earrings $13,750

Giorgio Armani ring $659

Kathy Rose for Roseark bracelet $13,000

This is apparently the lifestyle that a 19-year-old single (hockey) mom should aim for these days. More than $ 30,000 worth of accessories! Cool.

Bristol doesn't forget to mention another sponsor:

"I don't know if my mom will run (for President), but she should."

Why should Palin run? We don't know. Maybe because Palin with her 100 skeletons in the closet could single-handedly destroy the Republican Party? That would be a show we surely don't want to miss.

Next follows an even more bizarre picture: Bristol in another expensive dress - and wearing wellies ("Hunter-Boot boots"), outside!

The outfit?

Carolina Herrera Shrug $6,995
Isaac Mizrahi Gown $14,500

Too expensive for you? But the "Hunter Boot boots" only cost $ 115! Hockey moms, please proceed to the checkout!

The Palins obviously got a taste for expensive clothes during the campaign! ;-)

Now let's look at the content of the article.

We learn the following facts - some of them previously unknown:

- Bristol works as a "medical assistant" in a dermatologists office - from 8.00 am to 5.00 pm. Life is harsh: "I thought I would be somewhere warm at college with my friends. But that was definitely not possible with having Tripp."

- The workaday life is "interrupted" when she "combats teenage pregnancy" on behalf of the Candie's Foundation. "One day she might be shopping at Costco, and the next marketing abstinence on Oprah, Good Morning America, or the Today show." but Bristol manages because she "loves her baby more than anything".

- Now comes something new. There has been a lot of talk about Bristol's new "condo" in Anchorage. In Harper's Bazarr, Bristol finally goes into more detail: "She is also fiercely proud of her newly purchased condo." Not your average single mom - Bristol reveals that she bought the condo and paid for everything in it with her own money: "The big leather couches, the flat-screen TV's, Tripp's toddler-size bed (but he sleeps with his mother) and the Subaru wagon in the garage. "I am on my own", she says, in between constantly texting on her BlackBerry. "I am really proud of it. I am a hard worker."

So it seems to me that Candie's and People Magazine paid well! The cover story in In Touch Weekly alone brought $ 100,000 to the bank accounts of the Palins, to give an indication. One pregnancy (or more...) and then a few days of hard work, and kaboom, there is your condo! And just like her mother, she is already forming a close bond with her BlackBerry (Tripp, make sure you don't get between your mother and her BlackBerry!).

- There is more: We also learn that Track's girlfriend Britta Hanson (and not a boyfriend) is currently living in the third (!) bedroom, because Bristol was "scared to live by herself."

See Britta Hanson's slideshow with Track HERE.

And the condo is not excactly small: It's a "three story gray townhouse".

A short while ago Palingates learned from our Alaskan contacts that Bristol's condo is located on Arctic Boulevard in Anchorage. Here is a similar type of building:

So what else do we get to know? Quite a lot, actually. According to Bristol, her relationship to Levi Johnston is at freezing point: "He is a stranger to me."

And by all accounts, he is a stranger to his son as well, Bristol, because you have kept the two apart for months on end.

Bristol claims that she is single at the moment - Tripp is apparently the only "man" in her life: "I am in no rush. One day I will find a nice guy."

Right... ;-)

Other clues from the article reveal that Bristol is slowly morphing into a "Sarah Palin clone". Bending the truth - and even starting to talk about politics. First of all, despite the condo and her chi-chi lifestyle, Bristol is a victim. "There's been so much misreporting and lying about me and my family, it makes me sick" she says. "It proves a lot of reporters just report lies and rumors, so I'd push for more accountability."

Bristol, you know what makes ME sick? When people have a private life FULL of dirty secrets, pretend to be holier-than-thou and then accuse other people of lying!

Here is a fact you know all too well, Bristol: Tripp was your SECOND pregnancy. Is this a lie? No, it's isn't. It's the truth, and we know this already for a long time. And nobody has ever stopped us from saying that or even complained. Which is not surprising, because it's a true fact.

Bristol, you should also have a look at your old myspace-messages:

Your mother overheard a conversation with Johnny Chandler and then thought you were pregnant. Well, why would that be? As a result, she took your phone away for a few days.

So why did you say THIS to Harper's Bazaar:

Though Bristol was well-informed about sex education, "it's not like we sat down and were like, 'Alright, here's the birds and the bees.' Truly, my parents assumed that I wasn't doing anything. And it was a shock for us all."

Bristol, you lied to Harper's Bazaar. It's that simple.

As Bristol seems to have a problem with telling the truth, I am not sure that we should be listening to her political soundbites, but here they are:

Unsurprisingly, she is no Obama fan. "I think he is making more Americans become dependent on government, and he's acting like government can and should take care of everyone. This is completely contrary to what made America a great nation. We should be expected to take responsibility for ourselves."

Government shouldn't take care of everyone? Bristol, isn't it your son Tripp who receives free government healthcare in Alaska for Natives - which allows you in return to save the money for the insurance payments, which you then can spend on leather sofas, flatscreen TV's and other "useful" things?

Bristol, the reality is that single teenage moms usually don't have the "support network" of Candie's, People magazine, In Touch Weekly, Harper's Bazaar etc. that YOU apparently have:

We have entree into this cosy family scene because Bristol herself texted an invite.

Most young people cannot text Harper's Bazaar, Bristol! Think about that.

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A reader uploaded the whole article of Harper's Bazaar HERE.

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Bonus video (added by Regina):


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