Wednesday, 16 March 2011

Open thread - Wednesday

We need some humour, so here's an oldie but funny joke:

A firefighter was working on the engine outside the station, when he noticed a little girl nearby in a little red wagon with little ladders hung off the sides, and a garden hose tightly coiled in the middle.

The little girl was wearing a firefighter's helmet and the wagon was being pulled by her dog and her cat.

The firefighter walked over to take a closer look.

"That sure is a nice fire truck," the firefighter said with a smile.

"Thanks," the sweet little girl replied.

The firefighter looked a little closer. The girl had tied the wagon to her dog's collar and to the cat's testicles.

"Little partner," the firefighter said, "I don't want to tell you how to run your rig, but if you were to tie that rope around the cat's collar, I think you could go faster."

The little girl thought for a moment then replied,

"You're probably right, but then I wouldn't have a siren."

Moving to the other end of the scale, here's a joke mrsgunka sent me:

The family wheeled Grandma out on the lawn, in her wheelchair, where the activities for her 100th birthday were taking place. Grandma couldn't speak very well, but she would write notes when she needed to communicate.

After a short time out on the lawn, Grandma started leaning off to the right, so an orderly grabbed her, straightened her up, and stuffed pillows on her right.

A short time later, she started leaning off to her left, so again the orderly straightened her and stuffed pillows on her left.

Soon she started leaning forward, so the orderly again grabbed her, then tied a pillowcase around her waist to hold her up.

A nephew who arrived late came up to Grandma and said, 'Hi, Grandma, you're looking good! How are they treating you?'

Grandma took out her little notepad and slowly wrote a note to the nephew...

'Bastards won't let me fart.'

Let's finish with a couple of lovely postcards: