Monday, 30 March 2009

Busy Sarah

There are less than three weeks until the end of the legislative session. Sarah Palin will be rid of those pesky lawmakers for another year and will be able to go back to her nice, warm home in Wasilla and the lovely per diems!

Oh, she's already there? Blame it on the volcano. (Chevron tanks? Spill? Disaster? Whaaaat???)

Honestly, these lawmakers keep bothering the Governor with things like discussing the stimulus package, what are they thinking? She already said "Thanks, but no thanks"! ("I'm a fiscal conservative, I don't want to grow government.")

The Governor has better things to do, like giving interviews to People magazine, chatting (on camera) to her mates at Fox News, attending Christian events, important things!

Of course she hasn't forgotten her duties as governor, but hey, she can do that by press release. Modern technology is truly marvellous. A few clicks here and there and her latest announcement is instantly, in full glory, on her very own website!

Then there are chums to be appointed to various important positions. But that's the fun bit, she doesn't mind it at all and it gives her the chance to issue more press releases and grab some camera time.

(Mental note for all official communications: mention small government. They really like it in the Lower 48.)

Sarah has to check on the progress of her SarahPac, exchange the weekly e-mails with John Coale, it's hard work. (Not state business? Darn! Will have to do it when not on duty. On duty 24/7? Bill McAllister can't keep his mouth shut, why did he say that? Meg, help!)

Sometimes she worries, though. People keep filing "frivilous" ethics complaints and law suits and they cost a lot of money, you know? (Must start that legal fund, pronto!)

The Governor has a very busy schedule. She prays every day for those whining natives to behave themselves and seize some opportunity somewhere hundreds of miles away from their villages and leave her alone. (Why can't they be more like Todd?)

Sarah also prays for some fresh snow so the wolf slaughtering program can progress as planned.

Yes, this Legislative thingie in Juneau is a a pain in the neck, she's counting the days until it's all over!


Emily said...

Am I correct in thinking that Sarah Palin hasn't so much as mentioned the Redoubt eruptions anywhere? (I'm not sure which would be worse-- Palin's total neglect and apparent ignorance of the disaster, or Palin saying something like "You're in my prayers, all ya cool pro-Alaskan Alaskans" while providing no actual help.)

regina said...


As far as I know, her only response was some waffling about staying indoors while the ash was falling in Anchorage...


Anonymous said...

Oh Regina, you're using your snark keyboard today. Wonderful post. Keep it up. Poor poor GINO. So much havoc to wreak. So many important issues to ignore. There just aren't enough hours in the day. It's just exhausting. Sigh. Sucks to be her.

Anonymous said...

The reason that Sarah stays in Wasilla is because that's where her church is. If there's any praying to be done (and this would be the time for prayer), she needs everybody to gather around her and hold hands. Can't always depend on Piper for praying; the kid does have to go to school sometimes. You all remember what she said about the McCain campaign, about no one willing to hold hands and and pray with her-- well, maybe they are like that Juneau, too-- all work and no prayers.

Virginia Voter said...

Now that the weather is warming up, maybe Alaskans can start collecting signatures for a recall petition.

basheert said...

great blogpost - and sooooooo true!

CorningNY said...

Anonymous @21:31--
Who has time to deal with the issues when there's so much whining to do?!

Anonymous said...

If this post's issue weren't so sickening, it would be a funny one...:/

ALASKANS, GROW A PAIR OF ***** AND RECALL HER! Do NOT wait until next year or 2012!

HistoryGoddess said...

I've been lurking for a few months now and I need to tell you what a great job you are doing! Really enjoyed this post.